An eternal, comforting embrace

May 21, 2011 § 7 Comments

There was a girl, one of five that summer, alone. There had been so many before her, too many in my wavering opinion. It wasn’t my fault, location added to my appeal. I was in the centre of beautiful woodland, picturesque surroundings and it was remote. If we needed privacy, we would certainly get it here. However, she was definitely the prettiest of them all – I declare. I will never forget her beauty or how her lustrous skin felt as we touched for the first time.

On this particular summer’s morning, she stopped for longer than usual. She stood, silently staring across the unbroken, tranquil surface of the manor’s deepest lake, where I lay.

The morning sun shone across her troubled brow. For a solitary moment, I felt a deeply, undisturbed hope, things would be different this time. Her long blonde hair, flowing, shimmering gold in the dawning sun and refracting only the happiest of moments from within. The summer dress she wore complimenting her eternal beauty. Her gazed expression was not of sorrow but emptiness, of tiring lonely emptiness.

She had lost unconditional connection with other souls, left hollow by the passing of her loving parents. Unable to reconstruct the fragments of her fractured existence, she was lost in an eternal longing for untroubled times and a second of serenity. I knew, in empathy, as I had done so many times before her, I could guide her and help her through these troubled and tormented times.

Suddenly, the once calm breeze of the summer morning was broken by a tempest wind. The tree tops playfulness and the settled foliage of the forest floor shattered by gusts of deviant air. The chaos of her summer dress broke this once tranquil scene, exacerbating the confusion of her mind. The beautiful girls angelic expression echoed the troubles of her turbulent life.

As I rushed towards her, for a seemingly endless moment, quiescent she stood, defiant in her desires for resolution. Then, in a butterfly’s heartbeat, she stepped forward releasing and spreading her troubled hands like the wings of an angel. Taking a lasting breath, she left the security of the broken bridge and the shattered pieces of her broken life.

There was a moment. An irreplaceable moment, where all hope was lost, where the peace of what she longed for, disappeared, forever. A moment where the last breathe of a beautiful girl signalled the inevitable akin of two entities. A soul, lost in purposefulness and a body, desirous to guide her to the depths of everlasting peace.

As she crashed through my surface, our bodies met, and our existences collided, the silence of her breath was broken with the deafening sounds of my despair. I could do no more. I was helpless to comfort her in whatever she had known. All I can do is smother her and encapsulate her in my compassion, my empathy and my flowing love.

For, what seems an eternity, her heartbeat slows to the rhythm of my ebb. We hold each other, we gaze, we dance, we kiss and we comfort one another. I look deep into my beautiful angels eyes, they reflect and refract the piercing rays of sunshine from my surface for the last time.

The final rays of hope and light are diminishing as we fall deeper into each other and inevitably become one.

Before her soul departs, her life is lost in my tenebrous abyss and she fails to hear my timeless song I whisper to her departing soul, the words I often spoke, comforting her last breath. Words she longed to hear in her mortal form, ‘My fallen angel, your sufferance will be lost with me, forever, in my eternal comforting embrace’.


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§ 7 Responses to An eternal, comforting embrace

  • Oh man. I am sitting here with tears in my eyes, trying to type this. I simply could not stop reading and I could actually feel both the girl’s despair and whatever it was that was observing her’s compassion and desire to ease her inner turmoil and comfort her.

    How odd that it should be water, for I am a Pisces, a water sign, that should touch my heart with the power of your words.

    You are very good for someone claiming to only just now be setting out on the journey of becoming a writer.

    My one piece of advice?


    sending you a cyber hug for health, happiness, peace, and always and forever, loads and loads of love,

    marantha jenelle

    • Bayley Trew says:

      Hi Marantha. Thank you so much for your lovely, wonderful comment. When I write, I am never sure how the piece will be received or whether it will be liked at all. To hear that something I have written has been accepted in such a way gives me a fantastic boost of confidence. I only started writing last month. I have been a web developer for over 10 years, I am 40 next year and wanted to do something else with the rest of my life. Something that would give me 100% satisfaction. I really have found a love for the writing I never realised was there, may be it was boiling under the surface and needed to be released. I will never look back.

      I too, am a Pisces, maybe that’s how I was able to write the piece from the waters perspective. I will take your one piece of advice and guarantee that my heart is every piece I write, as that’s where it is leading me.

      Thank you again, for your kind words, they mean a great deal.

      • Believe it or not, I am teaching myself html! And let me tell you, I am developing a whole new way of seeing webpages! Man, I didn’t realize how much work goes into even the simpler ones. And I am also setting up my own personal site,, so that increases the growing respect and admiration I am developing for all of those who work so hard “behind the scenes” (and often unlauded and unappreciated, I might add) to make the internet such a wonderful place.

        Wishing you many blessings, and I will tell you this, you have talent, Pete, and yes, there are going to be times you will doubt yourself…times when the words will freeze right in the middle of a project, but just sit back, give yourself time, and the muses will once more speak to you.

        I truly hope you got that email I sent (and then resent), for you have made no mention of it save that you were going to try to read it. I would be honored if you would let me know what you thought of my work.

        Sending you a huge cyber hug for inspiration,luck and loads of happiness,


      • Bayley Trew says:

        hi Marantha, so sorry it’s taken me so long to reply. I am finally back online. As most people do when they have a particular skill-set, I take it for granted what I am capable of. I have been developing websites for over 10 years, so it comes naturally. If you need any advice, let me know and I will see if I can help. I have received your email and I have replied. I hope you received the replies. Thank you so much for your compliments. I genuinely feel that writing could be right career choice for me. I can only get better. ;o) I promise to pop over to your blog to continue reading your latest writings.


  • amaliasstory says:

    The romantics (I mean the writters belonging to the romantic literature movement) would be very proud of you 🙂
    Full of symbols, beautifully constructed, with a painful sensitivity and overwhelming understanding of a universal tragedy, the story sketches delicately the relationship between the character and the personified river. Beatifully written and wonderful use of literary figures of speech!

    • Bayley Trew says:

      Thank you so much for you comment. I wanted to push myself a little but more with this piece. I wanted to see if I had the ability to write in a totally different style. It seems by the comments from yourself and others that I have managed it. this will go a long way to giving me confidence in my writings. thank you again for your kind words.

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